Mom Life

Four years ago I wrote the post about respecting the no.

Respect The No

If you don’t feel like clicking, I’ll quote myself…

No matter how many times someone posts it on Facebook or Pinterest, there IS a glorification of busy and I really don't think its going to stop.  Truth be told, I don't mind being busy.  If the busy is on my own terms and I know that I made conscious decisions to make my schedule what it is.  Its when things get out of hand that makes me crazy lady.  Most likely, that's because I let someone guilt me into changing my "no" to a "yes".  So I'm saying lets just respect the "no" and not make it personal.

Four and a half years later, I’m sitting in a friends kitchen drinking a glass of wine and this blog post comes back up in conversation. In the days since, I’ve started to think about whether I really practiced what I preached in my post.

I think I’m a hypocrite. I know there was a time not so long ago that I was committing to everything put in front of me. I, for sure, wasn’t allowing room for my own thoughts. I also know that I was taking the no’s given to me personally. Not that I thought someone should be making time for some volunteer commitment I proposed but, I thought the no meant that the person was saying no to me. To committing to me. To being my friend. Sounds silly now.

The thing is, I’m the person that goes all in. If I say yes to something or I say yes to you…I’m all in. You have my loyalty and my commitment. If you ask me, its one of my worst and best qualities. In can be hurtful for me…but, in typical me fashion…I don’t talk about something until I have it all figured out in head and heart.

RESPECT THE NO AND NOT MAKE IT PERSONAL

I need to add to that….

Not everything you say yes to deserves your all in…not all commitments…not all relationships. Ask for help when you need it. Control is not worth your heart…your well being. Giving grace to others allows you to give grace to yourself. The things…the people…the commitments…the causes that are meant to be in the forefront of our lives will make themselves known. Just be open to the no’s so you can be open to the yes’s.

lifeTammy DeanComment